Posted On 11:41 AM |

After two weekends of tryouts in this first year of organized soccer since she was in kindergarten, my Little Girl didn't make the All-Star Soccer Team this season. Hubby forwarded me the "Unfortunately..."e-mail from the coach. Like a rabid mother hen, I ground my teeth smooth, thinking dark and stormy thoughts about the politics that MUST have been involved in this decision to cut my superstar. Hubby warned last weekend that many of the parents, including those whose children only attended one of the two mandatory tryouts, were noticeably chummy with the coaches. I got all "I SWEAR, if I see any of those kids on the team, I'm gonna be sooo pissed." (Seriously, can't you hear me saying those exact words?)

When Little Girl woke up, I lay on the bed with her, bracing myself for uncontrollable tears of rejection. I broke the news, my voice slightly shaking from my own emotion. She opened her mouth and whined out, Can I go downstairs now??

And so went the parenting lesson of the day.


I fell prey to that monster that eats up so many parents who are afraid to see our children fail or be left out, or just aren't the best. This monster lurks around the schools, the studios, gyms and fields where our kids participate in extra-curricular activities, and even bites our asses when we're around our fellow-parent family members. It's that hyper-protective instinct that made me want to chew off the heads of those coaches (and perhaps some of the other girls who tried out too, I'm afraid) this morning. The reality is, it's her first year back and she does have much to learn in this sport that she loves.

Not making the team, the less-than-stellar grade on a test, not winning Musical Chairs at the party, perhaps not even being invited to the party - they can take it. And these things are just as important as sharing, manners, studying, chores, etc., in teaching our children to be appreciative, independent, persevering adults. Because I'm pretty sure we didn't win everything or get everything we wanted when we were kids, and most of us turned out pretty darn okay.
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1 Response to '"Unfortunately..."'
  1. Cheryl Anne
    http://leiskitchen.blogspot.com/2009/06/unfortunately.html?showComment=1245954424041#c2131449891868962555'> June 25, 2009 at 2:27 PM

    Totally see what you mean. It's like we have these huge hopes for our kids, hopes that we think we share with then, and they seem unfazed with with our own disappointment in the system.

    I have to learn to take things in stride more. I guess sometimes, as parents, we need to learn from our kids!

    Sorry, though, that L didn't get in. I'd still be reeling from those parental cliques!