My reflections about parenthood this week are more in the past tense.  Big Girl has long since passed those all-important first five years, so on some levels, I've done all I can to help form the woman she is going to be.  But have I done enough?  Have I equipped her with the right decision-making tools as she approaches independence?  Has she learned from my example more often than my nagging (because I know that's what it is sometimes)?  Have her dad and I given her the world without handing her everything?  Will she turn to God in her times of both adversity and joy, which I have learned is a fail-proof life strategy?

Celebrating her twelfth birthday with her is a big deal for me because mine was my first celebrated without my own mom.  It began a stage when I felt alone, too old and too young at the same time, and chose friends over family more often.  And I know this is just part of the whole teenage thing, but as a parent, it is requiring immense effort for me to loosen my grip and let her step out that little bit farther than my arm's reach.  I just don't want to miss a thing.

She is a good kid.  She can see me as her greatest adversary sometimes, but she is also dangerously protective of me.  She is respectful, she's a pretty dancer, she's artsy, she's mastered the long bang sweep, she is thoughtful, smart, funny, she still lets me kiss her on the lips (ooh, how embarrassing for her) and she can't wait to sit in the passenger seat on the way to school on Monday.